#THATSNOTLOVE

 

hqdefaultOne Love, an organization that dedicates to raise awareness of dating violence and helping end relationship abuse recently created a video which stresses how abuse doesn’t always mean it’s physical. Bruises, black eyes, and scars are usually the things that come to mind when people think about relationship abuse, and while this form of abuse is very real and extremely horrific, we can’t dismiss other types of abuse.

It’s not based on your gender, sexual orientation, socioeconomic standing, ethnicity, religion or culture. According to www.loveisrespect.org, girls and young women between the ages of 16 and 24 experience the highest rate of intimate partner violence , but it’s important to remember that men aren’t dismissed from being victims. 

Many people are blinded of their partner’s abuse and live on thinking that it’s normal that their partner needs to know their whereabouts and who they’re with at all times, because it’s cute, right? They can’t stand being away from you. They always want to be beside you. They love you so much that if you’re gone for too long they get angry and blow up your phone until you reply to a text or finally call back. But it’s only because they love you.

That is the form in which many people who are in an emotionally abusive relationship think. The reality of how many people accept this kind of  behavior and believe that it is normal is detrimental. No one should feel harassed by their partners at any point, no matter how long the relationship has been going on for. Emotional abuse includes being afraid to go anywhere because a partner might threaten to leave them, having to stop talking to certain people and long time friends to create ease to a partner’s jealousy, and constantly being put down by hurtful words from a partner.

Many relationships have shifted from having a partner who seems like a best friend to having a partner who feels like responsibility and a third parent. People who cause the relationship abuse are often extremely manipulative and may convince their partners that their behavior is normal because it is their form of showing that they “love” them. These relationships are very dangerous because one may not even be aware that they’re in an emotionally abusive relationship which is why it occurs so often.

Relationships are about having fun with the person one is with and enjoying going out on dates but never about feeling obligated to spend time with someone in order to keep them happy. He may be your lover, she may be your lover, but it doesn’t mean you have to suffer.

Esmeralda Reyes

Staff Writer, NMHS Blue Prints

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